“Always be true to you.” These are the words my older sister, Trudy, loved to say. As you may know, Trudy is no longer with us, but her words echo in my heart. While these are beautiful and inspiring words to live by, it is not always easy to uphold them.
Our truth is always evolving because we are always evolving–our priorities, values, maturity, and our life in general are all constantly evolving.
My own truth has evolved quite a bit. Thankfully, what was true for me 10 years ago is more refined and evolved today, and most likely in another 10 years, my truth today will have evolved again.
Realizing your truth and orienting your life to it is essentially connecting to what your life is in service to: in other words, finding your “why.”
As Friedrich Nietzsche said, “He (or she) who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
In the process of finding your “why,” start by considering your values–they will be your anchor point. For example, some people value harmony, fairness, equality, peace, generosity, beauty, or cheer. In order to find your “why,” you must first go through a process of investigation. This process is similar to assembling your bug-out bag before the house catches fire. Finding your “why” involves getting really clear on your priorities. What do you value in life? What do you hold to be true, no matter what? And when a challenge hits, how does your truth hold up?
How willing are you, in the midst of challenge, to stay rooted in what you know to be true? Is your truth for sale? Can others buy your truth and sway you in support of their own truth? There will be times throughout your life when your truth is challenged and on the line. When this happens, it’s important to anchor into your values.
There are many different fractal reflections to the concept of truth. In order to stand firm in your values, you must have a degree of inner security that isn’t vulnerable to being affected by anything external, such as influences, manipulation, seduction, or price tags.
However, remaining true to yourself and standing in your truth may have consequences. Maintaining integrity may have consequences.
In the words of C.S. Lewis, “Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.”
I would go on to add, “…and in spite of the consequences.” You may lose friendships and relationships, money and resources, and you may even lose old parts of yourself. But this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. If people or factors in your life are not supportive of your truth and values, it may be time to leave them behind and continue on with the lessons you’ve learned from the experience.
It’s also important to consider how your truth affects other people. Standing in your truth can also look and feel like righteousness and become hierarchical if you are not careful. Your truth is no more important than someone else’s truth, and vice-versa. If your truth is leading to or causing violence and subjugation, you are using your truth as a position of power over others. Be unwavering in your convictions–unless you are causing harm. Always check yourself and your motives. Stand in your truth with strength and consistency, but make sure you are treating others with kindness and compassion.
Consider, too, the truth of the whole, or the collective. Society values fairness, equality, kindness, and service, among other things. Does your truth align with that of the collective? Try to be both in the trees and above them to see the whole forest. This is not an easy position to take, but a noble effort worth considering, for the benefit of both yourself and others.
For me, in times of challenge such as the one I am currently emerging from, it’s been comforting to see myself go through the whole gamut of different energetic and emotional triggers and experiences, and then to ultimately come back to peace and truth, my core values, along with integrity in my service to the collective. In a sense, I am grateful for an opportunity to stand firmly in my integrity, thus proving to myself that in spite of worldly and material temptations, I can still “do the right thing.” I’ve been willing to stay in the fight and fight for what’s right. I’ve experienced the seduction of influences, but I’ve held firm in the unwillingness to compromise because in not doing so, I would have ultimately sacrificed my integrity and truth.
My truth is sacred and your truth is sacred. We must guard our truth with courage and integrity, commitment and strength. In a world where many truths have a price tag, where lies are marketed and seduction is used to sway, where people are manipulated, masks are donned, and smoke lingers in the mirrors, we must cast our anchor to our truth and hold firm. Truth is not a currency and values are not a privilege–they are a right, and they are a right worth fighting for.
I challenge you to not bend or sway when it comes to what is right, but to stand tall and rooted in your truth. As Trudy said, “Always be true to you.”
To your health,
Get healthy. Stay present. Help out.